5 Things I've learned about being a mother
From my daughter:
1. Slow down - nothing makes Nora happier or more content
then those days we take things slow, we spend extra time
together getting things done. I'm happier, less stressed
and less tired.
2. Show respect - Nora always responds better when I ask her
to do things, or give her a heads up, or simply treat her with
respect. She does not like to be controlled or forced. (all this
within reason of course.)
3. The importance of affection - Nora is a little girl who needs
reasurance and lots of affection. But don't we all? it's amazing
what a little encouragement and a hug can do for nora. sometimes
a little cuddle goes a long way. And boy do I love those long
cuddles :)
4. Show how/set an example - Nora learns very quickly if
you show her things while you explain them. I show her how or
she watches me and the next time she's got it down. So remember
someone's almost always watching :)
5. Enjoy the simple things - dancing, singing, reading, laying
in bed, baking. These are some of the best ways to spend time with
Nora. She reminds me to slow down and just enjoy the small simple
moments that add up to a happy life.
Thank you Nora, for making me a mom. You have changed my life and filled it so full.
From my husband:
1. Give yourself a break - This parenting thing is HARD. Go easy on yourself.
I think it's in Psalms where it says, "the Lord gently leads those with young."
Just tell yourself, "it's O.K."
2. Forgive yourself - You are not and will not be perfect. You will lose patience,
you will regret your choices as a parent. You will probably feel like a failure.
But pick yourself off, forgive yourself and move on.
3. ASK FOR HELP - They can't read your mind, no one can. They don't see what you
see, they don't know what you need. So just ASK! It's ok to not be able to do
it alone. Ask for help, ask your mom, your neighbor, your friends, your family,
your husband and especially God.
4. Our "mom-bodies" are still attractive - post baby bodies can be depressing.
Our confidence takes quite the hit for alot of us. Coming to a place of acceptance
and confidence in this new body is a challenge. But my husband telling me I'm
still attractive helps. :) And i want my daughter to grow up with a confident mom.
I don't want her to watch me live a life constantly unhappy with myself. (refer to #4
what my daughter taught me)
5. Love & support - I dont' have to be perfect. The house doesn't have
to be spotless, dinner doesn't have to be made, we don't have to meet him
at the door smiling and happy, the dishes don't have to be done
(are they ever?). All Jordan needs is for me to love him and Nora and support
them. The rest is just life, focus on what's really important.
Thank you Jordan. You are an amazing husband and you always tell me I'm a wonderful
wife and mother. Your encouragement and support are so important. I love you!
From myself:
1. Follow your instincts - boy has this been a hard lesson. But God gave them to
us for a reason! Even if all "the books" say one thing, do what your instincts
tell you!
2. You know your child best - Yes, people have been raising kids for along time now.
But the fact remains, my kiddo is unique and was given to ME. I was the chosen
mother, thus I need to trust that I know how to parent her.
3. They will make you a better person - You want them to be better, but they copy you.
so there ya go! (see #4 under the daughter portion again :) ) And you will have to
adapt and change because life is different now. And all for the better. :)
4. Let them be - They are they're own person. Yes we need to be there for guidance
and protection. But really, kids need lots of room to explore, grow, discover, define
their limitations. Let them be who they were ment to be. Don't try to force what you
want. God gave them a mind and personality so let them use it!
5. Take a break - For goodness sake, preserve your sanity and get away. Drink your
entire cup of coffee in one sitting, go to dinner and not get up or worry about your
little one. Get away, find peace, find quiet, find solitude. Even for an hour. YOu
will be better for it!
From my Mom:
1. You are capable - My mom raised 5 kids, for awhile was homeschooling all of us,
ran 4 boys ( plus friends) to hockey, and me to basketball, was involved at church,
kept her passion for music, was a wonderful homemaker, accountant for my parent's
business, etc, etc, etc. I grew up knowing that we are capable. My mom showed me
what passion and love for your family, your savior and yourself looks like. But in
this she also showed me that we do have our limitations and we should respect them.
2. Cook & bake - I have ALOT of memories revolving around food :) food gone wrong,
food i didn't like, but mostly food i loved! My mom would always make time to bake.
O these memories make my mouth water! Doughnuts, cookies, cinnamon rolls. ugh YUM! But
she also had this uncanny ability to grab whatever she had and whip it into a meal.
She has taught me that "home" means many things, but one should be food prepared with
love. I didn't appreciate it enough growing up, but I sure do now.
3. Clean as you go - I am a stickler about this. I do not leave messes until they are
unmanageable. I have very few memories of our house being messy growing up. It was simple,
when you finish with something, you pick it up and then move on. This has translated
into all areas of my life. (almost, i still don't make the bed. You can't win um all!)
Life is easier when you take a few seconds to tidy up along the way. Its soooooo true!
4. Take your vitamins - My mom knows first hand what burnout does to our bodies.
To this day she still checks that I take vitamins :) And it's true, a few vitamins
mean a big difference alot of the time and keep me healthy and happy.
5. Sacrifice is worth it - My mom has sacrificed so much for us. But one thing that
comes to mind right now is how she was the last to bed and the first up. Every morning
she'd be up reading her Bible and praying. She gave up alot of sleep over the years :)
But more than that she has taught me to be a good mom, we have to give part of ourselves
away. We have to sacrifice our wants and wishes for our kids. These little people are so
worth it though. Thanks mom!
As she has told me, I finally understand more now that I am a mom. Thank you Mom for
all you've done. You are amazing, capable, wonderful and beautiful.
