Tonight I suddenly remembered toe lint.
Can it really be 2 years already since Nora was a big teeny weeny babe? I remember the first
time I found lint in her toes I laughed out loud.
Nora has been such a joy in our life. Our first year was tough and challenging. But when
she turned one she flipped a switch. The course of a few days she decided she wanted her own bed.
The course of a few weeks she decided she was done nursing. And within a month she was off walking.
Last year she learned balance while crunching leaves. This year we will run and race and throw them in the air and she will talk to me in full sentences. They may be a bit like yoda talks but hey, she gets her point across.
Last year she was just learning to wear shoes. This year she is mastering being comfortable barefoot outside.
Last year she was almost bald. This year I can achieve pigtails and sometimes a pony tail.
Last year I was imagining the day when she'd say "love you" and now she says it louder and louder if you don't respond right away. In fact when Jordan and I tell eachother we love you and she can hear. She'll pipe up after and say love you momma, love you dada. O man.
Nora is coming into that 2 year old stage. Where life can get very frustrating or she can suddenly feel
defiant or violent even. But then there are so many times she makes me melt.
Never before has someone been able to make me put my hand to my chest and say, "o my heart!" as i just turn into a puddle.
Nora is brave, intelligent, hilarious, silly, and so good at including everyone. I love it when she gets all excited and beckons us to follow her and shouts, "Come on guys!"
If i could go back 2 years I would tell myself,
you WILL make it through.
DO NOT STRESS about schedules or doing what books tell you. Learn what works for you and Nora. She DOES NOT fit into any preset approach.
Realize that pretty much everything is a phase.
Do not feel pressured to let her cry. Do what feels right for you and her.
Try a swing! maybe she'll nap in a swing!
breath her in, treasure those hands and those feet and the smallness of size.
take mental pictuers, slow down and memorize moments
treasure this time when she's not mobile :)
Pray more! Read your Bible while you nurse.
Go for walks!
Know that you are exactly what Nora needs. God made you to be her mom and trust that He will help you handle whatever comes your way.
And most of all, remember that motherhood is a journey. No one is a super mom day one or even year 2. It is a journey that constantly changes, challenges, blesses and takes your breath away. try to just enjoy it and teach Nora to do so too. Teach her to sit and breathe in the smells of fall, to feel the sun on her face.
Being a mom is so much more fulfilling yet excruciatingly harder then i ever imagined. I wouldn't change it for the world.
family
Thursday, September 10, 2015
Friday, May 8, 2015
5 things I've learned...
5 Things I've learned about being a mother
From my daughter:
1. Slow down - nothing makes Nora happier or more content
then those days we take things slow, we spend extra time
together getting things done. I'm happier, less stressed
and less tired.
2. Show respect - Nora always responds better when I ask her
to do things, or give her a heads up, or simply treat her with
respect. She does not like to be controlled or forced. (all this
within reason of course.)
3. The importance of affection - Nora is a little girl who needs
reasurance and lots of affection. But don't we all? it's amazing
what a little encouragement and a hug can do for nora. sometimes
a little cuddle goes a long way. And boy do I love those long
cuddles :)
4. Show how/set an example - Nora learns very quickly if
you show her things while you explain them. I show her how or
she watches me and the next time she's got it down. So remember
someone's almost always watching :)
5. Enjoy the simple things - dancing, singing, reading, laying
in bed, baking. These are some of the best ways to spend time with
Nora. She reminds me to slow down and just enjoy the small simple
moments that add up to a happy life.
Thank you Nora, for making me a mom. You have changed my life and filled it so full.
From my husband:
1. Give yourself a break - This parenting thing is HARD. Go easy on yourself.
I think it's in Psalms where it says, "the Lord gently leads those with young."
Just tell yourself, "it's O.K."
2. Forgive yourself - You are not and will not be perfect. You will lose patience,
you will regret your choices as a parent. You will probably feel like a failure.
But pick yourself off, forgive yourself and move on.
3. ASK FOR HELP - They can't read your mind, no one can. They don't see what you
see, they don't know what you need. So just ASK! It's ok to not be able to do
it alone. Ask for help, ask your mom, your neighbor, your friends, your family,
your husband and especially God.
4. Our "mom-bodies" are still attractive - post baby bodies can be depressing.
Our confidence takes quite the hit for alot of us. Coming to a place of acceptance
and confidence in this new body is a challenge. But my husband telling me I'm
still attractive helps. :) And i want my daughter to grow up with a confident mom.
I don't want her to watch me live a life constantly unhappy with myself. (refer to #4
what my daughter taught me)
5. Love & support - I dont' have to be perfect. The house doesn't have
to be spotless, dinner doesn't have to be made, we don't have to meet him
at the door smiling and happy, the dishes don't have to be done
(are they ever?). All Jordan needs is for me to love him and Nora and support
them. The rest is just life, focus on what's really important.
Thank you Jordan. You are an amazing husband and you always tell me I'm a wonderful
wife and mother. Your encouragement and support are so important. I love you!
From myself:
1. Follow your instincts - boy has this been a hard lesson. But God gave them to
us for a reason! Even if all "the books" say one thing, do what your instincts
tell you!
2. You know your child best - Yes, people have been raising kids for along time now.
But the fact remains, my kiddo is unique and was given to ME. I was the chosen
mother, thus I need to trust that I know how to parent her.
3. They will make you a better person - You want them to be better, but they copy you.
so there ya go! (see #4 under the daughter portion again :) ) And you will have to
adapt and change because life is different now. And all for the better. :)
4. Let them be - They are they're own person. Yes we need to be there for guidance
and protection. But really, kids need lots of room to explore, grow, discover, define
their limitations. Let them be who they were ment to be. Don't try to force what you
want. God gave them a mind and personality so let them use it!
5. Take a break - For goodness sake, preserve your sanity and get away. Drink your
entire cup of coffee in one sitting, go to dinner and not get up or worry about your
little one. Get away, find peace, find quiet, find solitude. Even for an hour. YOu
will be better for it!
From my Mom:
1. You are capable - My mom raised 5 kids, for awhile was homeschooling all of us,
ran 4 boys ( plus friends) to hockey, and me to basketball, was involved at church,
kept her passion for music, was a wonderful homemaker, accountant for my parent's
business, etc, etc, etc. I grew up knowing that we are capable. My mom showed me
what passion and love for your family, your savior and yourself looks like. But in
this she also showed me that we do have our limitations and we should respect them.
2. Cook & bake - I have ALOT of memories revolving around food :) food gone wrong,
food i didn't like, but mostly food i loved! My mom would always make time to bake.
O these memories make my mouth water! Doughnuts, cookies, cinnamon rolls. ugh YUM! But
she also had this uncanny ability to grab whatever she had and whip it into a meal.
She has taught me that "home" means many things, but one should be food prepared with
love. I didn't appreciate it enough growing up, but I sure do now.
3. Clean as you go - I am a stickler about this. I do not leave messes until they are
unmanageable. I have very few memories of our house being messy growing up. It was simple,
when you finish with something, you pick it up and then move on. This has translated
into all areas of my life. (almost, i still don't make the bed. You can't win um all!)
Life is easier when you take a few seconds to tidy up along the way. Its soooooo true!
4. Take your vitamins - My mom knows first hand what burnout does to our bodies.
To this day she still checks that I take vitamins :) And it's true, a few vitamins
mean a big difference alot of the time and keep me healthy and happy.
5. Sacrifice is worth it - My mom has sacrificed so much for us. But one thing that
comes to mind right now is how she was the last to bed and the first up. Every morning
she'd be up reading her Bible and praying. She gave up alot of sleep over the years :)
But more than that she has taught me to be a good mom, we have to give part of ourselves
away. We have to sacrifice our wants and wishes for our kids. These little people are so
worth it though. Thanks mom!
As she has told me, I finally understand more now that I am a mom. Thank you Mom for
all you've done. You are amazing, capable, wonderful and beautiful.
From my daughter:
1. Slow down - nothing makes Nora happier or more content
then those days we take things slow, we spend extra time
together getting things done. I'm happier, less stressed
and less tired.
2. Show respect - Nora always responds better when I ask her
to do things, or give her a heads up, or simply treat her with
respect. She does not like to be controlled or forced. (all this
within reason of course.)
3. The importance of affection - Nora is a little girl who needs
reasurance and lots of affection. But don't we all? it's amazing
what a little encouragement and a hug can do for nora. sometimes
a little cuddle goes a long way. And boy do I love those long
cuddles :)
4. Show how/set an example - Nora learns very quickly if
you show her things while you explain them. I show her how or
she watches me and the next time she's got it down. So remember
someone's almost always watching :)
5. Enjoy the simple things - dancing, singing, reading, laying
in bed, baking. These are some of the best ways to spend time with
Nora. She reminds me to slow down and just enjoy the small simple
moments that add up to a happy life.
Thank you Nora, for making me a mom. You have changed my life and filled it so full.
From my husband:
1. Give yourself a break - This parenting thing is HARD. Go easy on yourself.
I think it's in Psalms where it says, "the Lord gently leads those with young."
Just tell yourself, "it's O.K."
2. Forgive yourself - You are not and will not be perfect. You will lose patience,
you will regret your choices as a parent. You will probably feel like a failure.
But pick yourself off, forgive yourself and move on.
3. ASK FOR HELP - They can't read your mind, no one can. They don't see what you
see, they don't know what you need. So just ASK! It's ok to not be able to do
it alone. Ask for help, ask your mom, your neighbor, your friends, your family,
your husband and especially God.
4. Our "mom-bodies" are still attractive - post baby bodies can be depressing.
Our confidence takes quite the hit for alot of us. Coming to a place of acceptance
and confidence in this new body is a challenge. But my husband telling me I'm
still attractive helps. :) And i want my daughter to grow up with a confident mom.
I don't want her to watch me live a life constantly unhappy with myself. (refer to #4
what my daughter taught me)
5. Love & support - I dont' have to be perfect. The house doesn't have
to be spotless, dinner doesn't have to be made, we don't have to meet him
at the door smiling and happy, the dishes don't have to be done
(are they ever?). All Jordan needs is for me to love him and Nora and support
them. The rest is just life, focus on what's really important.
Thank you Jordan. You are an amazing husband and you always tell me I'm a wonderful
wife and mother. Your encouragement and support are so important. I love you!
From myself:
1. Follow your instincts - boy has this been a hard lesson. But God gave them to
us for a reason! Even if all "the books" say one thing, do what your instincts
tell you!
2. You know your child best - Yes, people have been raising kids for along time now.
But the fact remains, my kiddo is unique and was given to ME. I was the chosen
mother, thus I need to trust that I know how to parent her.
3. They will make you a better person - You want them to be better, but they copy you.
so there ya go! (see #4 under the daughter portion again :) ) And you will have to
adapt and change because life is different now. And all for the better. :)
4. Let them be - They are they're own person. Yes we need to be there for guidance
and protection. But really, kids need lots of room to explore, grow, discover, define
their limitations. Let them be who they were ment to be. Don't try to force what you
want. God gave them a mind and personality so let them use it!
5. Take a break - For goodness sake, preserve your sanity and get away. Drink your
entire cup of coffee in one sitting, go to dinner and not get up or worry about your
little one. Get away, find peace, find quiet, find solitude. Even for an hour. YOu
will be better for it!
From my Mom:
1. You are capable - My mom raised 5 kids, for awhile was homeschooling all of us,
ran 4 boys ( plus friends) to hockey, and me to basketball, was involved at church,
kept her passion for music, was a wonderful homemaker, accountant for my parent's
business, etc, etc, etc. I grew up knowing that we are capable. My mom showed me
what passion and love for your family, your savior and yourself looks like. But in
this she also showed me that we do have our limitations and we should respect them.
2. Cook & bake - I have ALOT of memories revolving around food :) food gone wrong,
food i didn't like, but mostly food i loved! My mom would always make time to bake.
O these memories make my mouth water! Doughnuts, cookies, cinnamon rolls. ugh YUM! But
she also had this uncanny ability to grab whatever she had and whip it into a meal.
She has taught me that "home" means many things, but one should be food prepared with
love. I didn't appreciate it enough growing up, but I sure do now.
3. Clean as you go - I am a stickler about this. I do not leave messes until they are
unmanageable. I have very few memories of our house being messy growing up. It was simple,
when you finish with something, you pick it up and then move on. This has translated
into all areas of my life. (almost, i still don't make the bed. You can't win um all!)
Life is easier when you take a few seconds to tidy up along the way. Its soooooo true!
4. Take your vitamins - My mom knows first hand what burnout does to our bodies.
To this day she still checks that I take vitamins :) And it's true, a few vitamins
mean a big difference alot of the time and keep me healthy and happy.
5. Sacrifice is worth it - My mom has sacrificed so much for us. But one thing that
comes to mind right now is how she was the last to bed and the first up. Every morning
she'd be up reading her Bible and praying. She gave up alot of sleep over the years :)
But more than that she has taught me to be a good mom, we have to give part of ourselves
away. We have to sacrifice our wants and wishes for our kids. These little people are so
worth it though. Thanks mom!
As she has told me, I finally understand more now that I am a mom. Thank you Mom for
all you've done. You are amazing, capable, wonderful and beautiful.
Friday, March 13, 2015
Ask people instead of Siri
I've been noticing commercials lately have been making me disgusted.
A phone carrier talks about how not having coverage everywhere all the time is unacceptable. It ends with a family watching a movie in a tent under a beautiful starlit sky in the mountains.
A car commercial plays a song "never slow down" while flashing clips of people doing things fast. things that have no need to be done fast.
I know that progress is a part of life. I get that technology will develop, life will change. But do we have to devalue it all? Is it so bad that I don't like touch screens?
Do we have to find ways to live faster, be busier? Do we really need to have phones and distractions constantly? I mean, I find it hard to sit and watch a show w/o multi-tasking.
I have always tried to remember to enjoy life, to embrace the quiet and find time to slow my pace. But I worry about our society and the model for my daughter we're setting. I don't want my daughter to have to contend with my phone, or my computer. I don't want to eventually have to contend with her phone in exchange.
I appreciate technology. I love looking up a recipe I don't have in a cookbook. Or being able to google something to find an answer or put my mind to rest.
Yet, even on that note. I find I spend time problem solving less. I don't try to figure things out myself much anymore cause a quick search is all it takes.
My creativity gets stunted because I can search pinterest for ideas instead of coming up with original ones.
Yes these are all good things, but I never want to lose the ability or desire to live without.
Challenge yourself, don't let technology be a constant crutch. Spend a night, morning, or even a day tech - free! commit to asking people instead of siri. Try to do the math or find an answer with a book. Answer those questions your kids ask instead of sending them to the internet. Call your mom for a recipe instead of 1000 strangers on allrecipes.com.
Yes technology is good, a gift, a plus. But, it's also a crutch.
A phone carrier talks about how not having coverage everywhere all the time is unacceptable. It ends with a family watching a movie in a tent under a beautiful starlit sky in the mountains.
A car commercial plays a song "never slow down" while flashing clips of people doing things fast. things that have no need to be done fast.
I know that progress is a part of life. I get that technology will develop, life will change. But do we have to devalue it all? Is it so bad that I don't like touch screens?
Do we have to find ways to live faster, be busier? Do we really need to have phones and distractions constantly? I mean, I find it hard to sit and watch a show w/o multi-tasking.
I have always tried to remember to enjoy life, to embrace the quiet and find time to slow my pace. But I worry about our society and the model for my daughter we're setting. I don't want my daughter to have to contend with my phone, or my computer. I don't want to eventually have to contend with her phone in exchange.
I appreciate technology. I love looking up a recipe I don't have in a cookbook. Or being able to google something to find an answer or put my mind to rest.
Yet, even on that note. I find I spend time problem solving less. I don't try to figure things out myself much anymore cause a quick search is all it takes.
My creativity gets stunted because I can search pinterest for ideas instead of coming up with original ones.
Yes these are all good things, but I never want to lose the ability or desire to live without.
Challenge yourself, don't let technology be a constant crutch. Spend a night, morning, or even a day tech - free! commit to asking people instead of siri. Try to do the math or find an answer with a book. Answer those questions your kids ask instead of sending them to the internet. Call your mom for a recipe instead of 1000 strangers on allrecipes.com.
Yes technology is good, a gift, a plus. But, it's also a crutch.
Sunday, March 8, 2015
Just some jumbled thoughts for tonight
I am so jealous of Nora sometimes.
I wish...
I could fit in a laundry basket or someones arms
That people found the way I pronounce words ridiculously cute
That I could be thoroughly entertained by a box or a birthday card or a piece of junk mail for hours
That all I had to do was call and my mommy or daddy would be right there
That I could dress in such crazy colors and feel confident (or is it oblivious)
That I only needed 1-3 words to convey what I want
But!
I am honored to be able to watch her do these things and try to remember them all.
I sing a song to Nora most nights and I hope it is just one of the ways I can help her feel free as she grows up.
Safe, you are safe.
You are warm.
You are Loved.
You are strong as the forest
Resilient as a river
Lovely as a sunset
and sweet like mountain air.
I wish...
I could fit in a laundry basket or someones arms
That people found the way I pronounce words ridiculously cute
That I could be thoroughly entertained by a box or a birthday card or a piece of junk mail for hours
That all I had to do was call and my mommy or daddy would be right there
That I could dress in such crazy colors and feel confident (or is it oblivious)
That I only needed 1-3 words to convey what I want
But!
I am honored to be able to watch her do these things and try to remember them all.
I sing a song to Nora most nights and I hope it is just one of the ways I can help her feel free as she grows up.
Safe, you are safe.
You are warm.
You are Loved.
You are strong as the forest
Resilient as a river
Lovely as a sunset
and sweet like mountain air.
Friday, January 30, 2015
Dinner with Nora
I have heard and read about horror stories of dining out with toddlers. But I have to just brag on my little girl tonight.
We decided to go out to eat @ Ruby Tuesdays tonight, sort of to celebrate Jordan's new job.
Nora was a rockstar!
She colored until the food came. We had 3 crayons and she insisted that we color with her. She was so sweet and inclusive. Of course she said Hi and waved to people. So great.
Then when appetizers came she sat next to me eating with a fork and insisting she had to dip her chicken in the dip bowl, not the dip I had placed on her plate. :) Then she started coloring again until dinner came. Again she was just so prim and proper eating her food (well as prim and proper as a toddler can be.) She was very excited about her daddy's fries and asked for dip (ketchup). Then we played with her stuffed animal she had brought and she would get down and back up on the booth.
So thankful we got a corner booth so she had an area she could be rowdy in. She even got down to dance at one point. I highly recommend booths when you go out with kiddos, controlled freedom. :)
Then the best part; dessert! I got a triple chocolate cake and Jordan got cheesecake. She got all excited and climbed next to me and said "bite?" I gave her a bite and she put her hands up to her face, "mmmm!" HAHA! we were dying laughing! Then Jordan offered her some cheesecake and she says "No no no no no!" even pushing Jordan's hand away and then leans toward me with her mouth wide open. Again riotous laughing. She takes after her momma!
I just love how she is just our little buddy and how friendly she is when people stop to say hi or watch her cuteness. It is not always like this, but what a fun night!
O and the food was grrrrrreat!!! My steak could be pulled apart with a fork. sooooooooooo good! yea it was a great night. Alright thats all, no revelations just wanted to remember this and brag on my baby girl.
We decided to go out to eat @ Ruby Tuesdays tonight, sort of to celebrate Jordan's new job.
Nora was a rockstar!
She colored until the food came. We had 3 crayons and she insisted that we color with her. She was so sweet and inclusive. Of course she said Hi and waved to people. So great.
Then when appetizers came she sat next to me eating with a fork and insisting she had to dip her chicken in the dip bowl, not the dip I had placed on her plate. :) Then she started coloring again until dinner came. Again she was just so prim and proper eating her food (well as prim and proper as a toddler can be.) She was very excited about her daddy's fries and asked for dip (ketchup). Then we played with her stuffed animal she had brought and she would get down and back up on the booth.
So thankful we got a corner booth so she had an area she could be rowdy in. She even got down to dance at one point. I highly recommend booths when you go out with kiddos, controlled freedom. :)
Then the best part; dessert! I got a triple chocolate cake and Jordan got cheesecake. She got all excited and climbed next to me and said "bite?" I gave her a bite and she put her hands up to her face, "mmmm!" HAHA! we were dying laughing! Then Jordan offered her some cheesecake and she says "No no no no no!" even pushing Jordan's hand away and then leans toward me with her mouth wide open. Again riotous laughing. She takes after her momma!
I just love how she is just our little buddy and how friendly she is when people stop to say hi or watch her cuteness. It is not always like this, but what a fun night!
O and the food was grrrrrreat!!! My steak could be pulled apart with a fork. sooooooooooo good! yea it was a great night. Alright thats all, no revelations just wanted to remember this and brag on my baby girl.
Thursday, January 8, 2015
musings
I remember back during our first couple months of marriage, in our beyond tiny apartment, Jordan and I had a conversation.
Jordan: "When we have kids, we should have a rule that they are not allowed to talk to us when we are going to the bathroom. That we would get to go to the bathroom in peace."
Me: "Ooo, that's a good idea. Yep, lets make that happen."
-----
Looking back on it all I can do is chuckle to myself. Oh, how naive we were.
But it gets me to thinking, remembering (or at least trying to) what it was like to live without Nora. Only having to think about each other and what we wanted to do. I didn't have to dress another person and prep snacks etc before I ran to store for 3 things, only to come home 2 hours later.
Honestly, there is much I miss about that kind of freedom. But then I realize how much joy there is in hearing my girl say banana or watching her take of her own coat, zipper and all, or how she insists I wear my hat too. How much fun it is to tell her what we are getting at the grocery store and hear her try and say the words. Or letting her pick out the produce and put it in the bag. And yes even when she comes bursting into the bathroom yelling for me as I pee, I love my life with her in it.
It just blows my mind to think how little I knew life with a child would be like. I'm convinced there is no preparing for life with your first child. Not for the challenges, the lack of sleep, the rediscovery of the simple things or the joys they bring every moment of the day.
But most of all our children teach us of how fleeting life is. All to soon moments are gone, stages are passed and all you are left with are memories and hopes of what's to come.
That's why I hold tight, close my eyes, take a deep breath and try to memorize the way it feels everytime Nora gives me a long hug.
Jordan: "When we have kids, we should have a rule that they are not allowed to talk to us when we are going to the bathroom. That we would get to go to the bathroom in peace."
Me: "Ooo, that's a good idea. Yep, lets make that happen."
-----
Looking back on it all I can do is chuckle to myself. Oh, how naive we were.
But it gets me to thinking, remembering (or at least trying to) what it was like to live without Nora. Only having to think about each other and what we wanted to do. I didn't have to dress another person and prep snacks etc before I ran to store for 3 things, only to come home 2 hours later.
Honestly, there is much I miss about that kind of freedom. But then I realize how much joy there is in hearing my girl say banana or watching her take of her own coat, zipper and all, or how she insists I wear my hat too. How much fun it is to tell her what we are getting at the grocery store and hear her try and say the words. Or letting her pick out the produce and put it in the bag. And yes even when she comes bursting into the bathroom yelling for me as I pee, I love my life with her in it.
It just blows my mind to think how little I knew life with a child would be like. I'm convinced there is no preparing for life with your first child. Not for the challenges, the lack of sleep, the rediscovery of the simple things or the joys they bring every moment of the day.
But most of all our children teach us of how fleeting life is. All to soon moments are gone, stages are passed and all you are left with are memories and hopes of what's to come.
That's why I hold tight, close my eyes, take a deep breath and try to memorize the way it feels everytime Nora gives me a long hug.
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